Friday, August 19, 2011

Date Night

I’ve been desperately carving out time to spend with Amelia alone. Our relationship has shifted profoundly since Annie was born and I’ve seen the stress on her. While she is sincerely and genuinely kind and loving to her sister, Amelia’s acting out through this transition has mostly been aimed at me. She even hit me a few times in the first couple weeks. It has been probably equally painful for me, this shift in our relationship. It’s just not what it used to be. Can’t be. I just keep telling myself that this time with the baby is temporary and in just a few months, I’ll be more free to spend time with Amelia and share more with her again.

All in all though, it has to be said that Amelia has handled this transition really well. There were a few episodes in the beginning that were rough, but she really does love her sister to no end and appears to really understand that Annie is a baby and needs special attention. It’s still early I guess, but I have faith in her. I truly think the transition has been harder on me. Watching her cling to her dad and say that she wants him all the time just sucks, but I know that nobody’s replacing the Mama anytime soon and her and I will go back to our own special relationship soon enough. . . even if it will never be as it was.

Anyway, the whole reason I started this post was because again, I’ve been trying to make time for special Amelia adventures. We started tiny when I took her to get her hair cut for an hour. It was the first time we’d been alone since Annie’s birth (maybe 3-4 weeks at that time) and as soon as we walked out of the house, Amelia said, “It’s just you and me mama??” Heart. Breaking. And then one day I surprised her at school at pick-up time (a task that Justin has done solely since a week before Annie arrived) and we shared a smoothie before heading home. Too fun.

Last night, I took Amelia on a real date night. We went to the movies and watched the new Winnie the Pooh flick and then off to dinner. She was pretty excited.

The only theater still playing that movie was a ways from home, so as we got closer, she asked “Are we close to the moooovie Gator mama?”


“The Mooovie Gator.”

You mean the movie theater?

Yeah. The Mooovie Gator.”

Thee-uh-terr. The movie theater. Say it.



“Do you see the Movie Gator mama?”

Sigh. We are getting close sweetie. Very close. We’ll be there soon.

And then I looked back to see her “looking for the mooovie gator.”

movie gator


Those are her binoculars apparently. ha.

Since we were on a special date night, I went all out and got popcorn AND a slurpee. Serious business. Amelia’s never had a slurpee before last night, but I’m pretty sure she’s a fan.



The movie was pretty cute and appropriately short for the kids’ age. It was just the classic Pooh story book story in a movie. You know the one—with the red balloon. Since we got out of the movie earlier than expected, we decided to hit dinner too. I asked Amelia what she wanted to eat and she was contemplating when I thought of the perfect place. I’d seen an IHOP on the way to the theater and as we walked out, I told her that there was a restaurant that made tons of pancakes, even for DINNER. To which she replied, “OOOOHHHHHHHHHH. I want pancakes.” When we got to the restaurant, she asked what it was called and when I told her, she said, “I LOOOOOOVE IHOP mama” as she skipped in the door.

So it turns out that IHOP is really empty at night with exception to several people eating alone. Since it was so quiet, Amelia got a lot of attention from the staff and she even ordered for herself and responded to all the waiters who asked us how everything was. Very grown up, you know. OH! And it also turns out that kids eat free at IHOP every night. What the heck and who know?!

It was a sweet little date night with my favorite first-born. It kind of broke my heart that it’s come to this—special occasions—but felt pretty good about it. Although I was totally exhausted by the time we got home. ha. Oh and that Amelia asked for her daddy ALL the way home. *heavy sigh* On the flip side, Annie was VERY happy to see me and even smiled when I fed her.

Lastly, the whole time I was out with Amelia last night, I kept thinking about how I never got away like that when SHE was a baby. What the heck?! How can I manage to get away from the baby this time when I was in complete and total captivity the first time? And now that I can pry myself away from the little chubby leach at home, I need to spend it with the other babychild? Does that mean that I could have seen friends or laid by the pool or just done anything by myself back THEN?! I am really beginning to mourn for the first time mother in me who had it so rough.

In any case, we’re all making it work. And if a date night is all I’ve got for a while, then a date night we shall have.


Good grief, I love my girl.

1 comment:

Monica said...

My mom always did special "mother-___ (insert child's name)" dates. It was our special time alone with mom to go to the movies, eat food, or whatever fun thing we wanted to do. Those were special times and your girls will look forward to them with you too :)